“There is something in every one of you that waits and listens for the sound of the genuine in yourself. It is the only true guide you will ever have. And if you cannot hear it, you will all of your life spend your days on the ends of strings that somebody else pulls.” – Howard Thurman
There is nothing like facing the death of your child to make you ask yourself, what in the hell am I doing here? I have an immense feeling of guilt. A parent is not supposed to live longer than their child, and if you do then you must have done something wrong. Thus, I feel like I am supposed to do something good with my life. I am Kiran’s legacy. It’s part mission and part penance, my own hairshirt (yes, I was raised a Catholic or maybe I am just a serious BNL fan…take your pick).
What if I don’t do something special? Is that ok? Will people still remember Kiran?
What I know is that the genuine in me was to be Kiran’s mom. So what now?
#1 by Kathleen on April 13, 2010 - 8:52 pm
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I will never forget Kiran…I will never forget you or Sekhar and how much all of you have made an impact on my life as a person and as a professional. I know that I am not alone.
#2 by auntie shelley on April 14, 2010 - 11:31 am
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You have already done something special by sharing Kiran with your family and friends, and by being an incredible mother to him when he was with us. You continue to do something special and important by keeping him in your heart and by continuing to share his story, here and elsewhere. Like Kathleen, I will never forget Kiran, and I will also never forget the love and the strength you and Sekhar have demonstrated since pretty much the moment Kiran was born. As hard as I know it can be sometimes to keep putting one foot in front of the other, I still see you both demonstrating that love and that strength every day. Because of that, I have to believe that not only will all of us who knew and loved Kiran never forget him, but that many others with whom we all come into contact over the years will come to know and remember him as well.
#3 by peggy (grandma) on April 16, 2010 - 6:24 pm
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Tricia you will always be special to me as a daughter and a mother. Kiran was so wonderful and no one will ever forget that beautiful boy. Kiran was our amazing gift from you and Sekhar and we couldn’t love you more
xoxo